HJA 437 Scenes 20-23

For new readers. Read the http://cialistadalafils.com/ previous HJA 437 posts starting Feb 5 before reading this.

20.   INT.   JANET’S LIVING ROOM.   DAY.   
ROSE AND JANET ARE LOOKING FONDLY INTO A PRAM.

ROSE:

Oh he’s lovely Janet. Gorgeous.

JANET:

Brian doesn’t think so, he says he looks like Winston Churchill.

ROSE:

All men think babies look like Winston Churchill Janet. (LEANS OVER TO SPEAK TO THE BABY) But you don’t look like Winston Churchill, do you. No. You’re a little love, aren’t you. Look at him laughing. (TO JANET) Have you decided on a name for him yet?

JANET:

Darren. After that bloke in ‘Bewitched’.

ROSE:

That’s nice. Nice and modern.

JANET:

We were thinking of giving him a second name as well. If it’s all right with you.

ROSE:

All right with me?

JANET:

And Geoff. You see it would be sort of in honour of you and Geoff for getting me to the hospital on time.

ROSE:

That’s very thoughtful of you, Janet.

JANET:

The problem is we can hardly call him Rose….. and we don’t like the name Geoff. No offence.

ROSE:

None taken, I’m not all that keen on it myself.

JANET:

So we thought we’d call him after your car instead.

ROSE:

Zephyr Zodiac? Darren Zephyr Zodiac?

JANET:

(LAUGHS) No, Ford. It’s a Ford. According to Brian. Both of us think it’s a nice name Ford, very manly.

ROSE:

Well it’s certainly better than Zephyr Zodiac. Anyway if you called him that he might never get out if he turns out anything like our Zephyr Zodiac.

JANET:

Have you heard anything about it yet? Your car?

ROSE:

Not yet. We went out looking for it yesterday but we didn’t have any luck. I didn’t think we would but it’s worth a try.

JANET:

I’ll keep an eye out for it myself when I’m walking Darren Ford out.

ROSE:

Thanks. We’re going looking again this weekend if it still hasn’t turned up. Somewhere else this time.

JANET:

Well I hope you find it. I feel dead guilty about it. I mean if it hadn’t been for me…..

ROSE:

Don’t talk so daft, Janet. It was just one of those things. Anyway at least it’s got Geoff and me going out together again.

FADE

21.   EXT.   SUBURBAN MANCHESTER STREETS.   DAY.

ROSE AND GEOFF ARE WALKING ALONG LOOKING FOR THEIR CAR. AS WELL AS CARS PARKED AT THE ROADSIDE AND ON THE DRIVES OF HOUSES THEY ARE CHECKING OUT PASSING CARS.

CUT TO

ANOTHER STREET. THEY WALK ALONG. THEY TURN A CORNER INTO YET ANOTHER STREET. A BLACK ZEPHYR ZODIAC IS PARKED ON THE OPPOSITE SIDE OF THE STREET. ROSE SPOTS IT BEFORE GEOFF. SHE GRABS HIS ARM AND POINTS IN THE DIRECTION OF THE CAR.

ROSE:

Geoff!

GEOFF LOOKS.

GEOFF’S POV.  THE CAR IS NEAR ENOUGH FOR US TO SEE THAT IT IS THE WRONG REGISTRATION.

ON GEOFF AND ROSE.


GEOFF:

No, not ours. Wrong reg. Ours is HJA 437.

DISAPPOINTED, THEY WALK ON.

FADE

21.   INT.   JANET’S LIVING ROOM.   DAY.


ROSE AND JANET ARE HAVING COFFEE.

JANET:

But it wasn’t yours?

ROSE:

Same colour and everything. Different registration.

JANET:

Whereabouts were you looking?

ROSE:

The Belle Vue area.

JANET:

Why there?

ROSE:

It was the first bus that came along. But we’re going to be a bit more systematic about it in future. I’m going to get an A to Z and cross off the area and the streets as we cover them so we don’t end up looking down the same streets. We’re doing Didsbury this weekend.

JANET:

Oh it’s nice there. You get a lot of university students living there.

ROSE:

Yes, just the sort of people who pinch cars.

FADE

22.   EXT.   STREETS OF DIDSBURY, MANCHESTER.


ROSE AND GEOFF ARE LOOKING FOR THEIR CAR. THEY TURN A CORNER. WE GO WITH THEM. ROSE NOTICES A CAFÉ UP AHEAD.

ROSE:

(INDICATES THE CAFÉ) I don’t know about you but I’m ready for a drink.

GEOFF:

Yes, all right.

THEY ENTER THE CAFÉ.

FADE

23.   INT.   CAFÉ.   DAY.


ROSE AND GEOFF ARE SEATED NEAR TO THE WINDOW HAVING COFFEE.

ROSE:

Have you spoken to the insurance yet?

GEOFF:

Them!

ROSE:

You have then.

GEOFF:

It’ll be weeks, months before they cough up, if they ever do. ‘We’ve got to make absolutely sure that the vehicle is permanently missing, Mr Horsefield’. They’re about as much use as the police. It would be a different story if it was their Zephyr Zodiac that had been pinched.

ROSE:

Well we might find it yet. But not while we’re sat here. (SHE DRAINS HER CUP THEN INDICATES GEOFF’S CUP) Have you finished yet?

GEOFF:

I think I’ve had enough for today Rose. If I have to look at any more cars I’ll go mad.

ROSE:
(HAS A THOUGHT) I tell you what. We’re quite near the river, here. It’s lovely there. We went there a couple of times when we were courting. Do you remember?

GEOFF:

Yes. Yes I do.

ROSE:

We could go. Take our mind off looking for the car for a bit.

GEOFF:

(COMES TO A DECISION) Yes. Yes all right then.

FADE


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Published by

Razzamatazz

Hi. I’m Terry Ravenscroft, I’m aged 67 and…..whoooah, come back, I’m not ready to have the lid nailed down on my coffin just yet. Anyway I’m a very young 67. (About five years ago I went to see Pulp at the Manchester Evening News Arena. I was older than everyone else by at least 35 years. The eighteen-year-old next to me asked me if I’d ever been to the venue before. I replied ‘Yes I saw George Formby here once’. She’d never heard of him.) This blog is going to be about my life and the way I see things. Before I retired I was a comedy scriptwriter for Les Dawson and Smith and Jones amongst others so there’s a sporting chance that some of the things I write will be funny. One of the reasons I’m writing this blog, although by no means the only reason, is because I have a website www.topcomedy.co.uk which I hope you will log on to occasionally. I have yet to meet anybody who doesn’t like Dear Air 2000…. My hobbies are walking, playing crown green bowls, watching football, birdwatching , cooking, and, according to The Trouble, moaning. Oh, and I have a thing about Kristen Scott Thomas. A couple of people I will be mentioning from time to time are The Trouble and Atkins Down The Road. The Trouble is my wife. I don’t call her The Trouble because it’s cockney rhyming slang for ‘wife, trouble and strife’, but because she has the habit of starting sentences, especially to me, with the words ‘The trouble with you is….’ Then goes on to complete the rest of the sentence with words like ‘you never listen when I’m talking to you’ or ‘you never see the other person’s point of view’ or some such other frivolous complaint. Atkins Down The Road is my best friend and lives, not surprisingly, down the road. I started a weblog a couple of years ago but stopped doing it to write a novel about golf called ‘A Good Walk Spoiled.’ If you want to read the weblog it can be found on my website, if you want to read the novel it can be found on my other website, Razzamatazz, at www.razza.fsnet.co.uk along with lots of other things. Hi. I’m Terry Ravenscroft, I’m aged 67 and…..whoooah, come back, I’m not ready to have the lid nailed down on my coffin just yet. Anyway I’m a very young 67. (About five years ago I went to see Pulp at the Manchester Evening News Arena. I was older than everyone else by at least 35 years. The eighteen-year-old next to me asked me if I’d ever been to the venue before. I replied ‘Yes I saw George Formby here once’. She’d never heard of him.) This blog is going to be about my life and the way I see things. Before I retired I was a comedy scriptwriter for Les Dawson and Smith and Jones amongst others so there’s a sporting chance that some of the things I write will be funny. One of the reasons I’m writing this blog, although by no means the only reason, is because I have a website www.topcomedy.co.uk which I hope you will log on to occasionally. I have yet to meet anybody who doesn’t like Dear Air 2000…. My hobbies are walking, playing crown green bowls, watching football, birdwatching , cooking, and, according to The Trouble, moaning. Oh, and I have a thing about Kristen Scott Thomas. A couple of people I will be mentioning from time to time are The Trouble and Atkins Down The Road. The Trouble is my wife. I don’t call her The Trouble because it’s cockney rhyming slang for ‘wife, trouble and strife’, but because she has the habit of starting sentences, especially to me, with the words ‘The trouble with you is….’ Then goes on to complete the rest of the sentence with words like ‘you never listen when I’m talking to you’ or ‘you never see the other person’s point of view’ or some such other frivolous complaint. Atkins Down The Road is my best friend and lives, not surprisingly, down the road. I started a weblog a couple of years ago but stopped doing it to write a novel about golf called ‘A Good Walk Spoiled.’ If you want to read the weblog it can be found on my website, if you want to read the novel it can be found on my other website, Razzamatazz, at www.razza.fsnet.co.uk along with lots of other things.

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